Sex Before Marriage, How Far Is Too Far?
Song of Solomon 2:1-13
In culture, sexual conquest is the social marker for who’s in and who’s out. The bible tells us that sex is a gift from God, created for our good and for God’s glory. Adam and Eve were naked and unashamed, able to have perfect sex. Sex takes two people and makes them one, and each time a married couple have sex they are renewing this oneness. In the New Testament, Paul even said sex was a form of spiritual protection in marriage against adulterous temptations from Satan, and is to be done regularly in marriage, not just to procreate.
Great sex requires guarded eyes. Porn does not aid our sex life, it causes guilt and shame and robs yourself and your spouse of great sex as proven physiologically and psychologically. Great sex also requires a servant heart, where each partner understands their own desires and what causes excitement. Know each other’s interests and passions, use your God-given imagination with a renewed mind in Christ, and embrace your playful side. Great sex also requires lots of practice. This practice must be in marriage: abstinence in singleness, faithfulness in marriage. Adultery is sleeping with anyone who is not your spouse, and sexual immorality comes from the Greek work pornea, which is a broad term for any sexual activity outside of marriage.
All have committed spiritual adultery against Christ. Still, when we choose to follow Christ, and trust in him to cleanse us of all our sins, there ought not be a hint of sexual immorality in the life of Christian. Do not awaken love before its time, lest you burn with passion. Marriage is the solution to passion. In dating, respect boundaries and find other ways to show love and appreciation without sex. We would be wise to acknowledge this cost of discipleship as believers.
16 Sep 2013
Guy is the founding and Senior Pastor of City on a Hill, a church that began in 2007 with a small team and a big vision. Today City on a Hill is a movement of many churches that gathers across multiple locations, in different cities and is united around the central mission of knowing Jesus and making Jesus known. Guy is a passionate communicator of the gospel who is committed to engaging culture with the beauty, truth, and relevance of Jesus. Guy graduated with a BA in Public Relations from RMIT University and has a Masters of Divinity from Ridley College. He is the husband to Vanessa and the father to four children. He is an ordained Anglican Minister and member of Acts 29.